Retirement

[Drew Saunders]

And They Ask---Why I Like Retirement????






[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]

Question: How many days in a week?

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Answer: 6 Saturdays, 1 Sunday [/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Question: When is a retiree's bedtime? [/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Answer: Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch.[/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Question: How many retirees to change a light bulb? [/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Answer: Only one, but it might take all day. [/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Question: What's the biggest gripe of retirees? [/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Answer: There is not enough time to get everything done.[/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Question: Why don't retirees mind being called Seniors? [/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Answer: The term comes with a 10% percent discount. [/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Question: Among retirees what is considered formal attire? [/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Answer: Tied shoes. [/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Question: Why do retirees count pennies? [/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Answer: They are the only ones who have the time. [/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Question: What is the common term for someone who enjoys work and refuses to retire? [/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Answer: NUTS![/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Question: Why are retirees so slow to clean out the basement, attic or garage? [/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Answer: They know that as soon as they do, one of their adult kids will want to store stuff there. [/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Question: What do retirees call a long lunch? [/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Answer: Normal [/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Question: What is the best way to describe retirement? [/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Answer: The never ending Coffee Break. [/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Question: What's the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree? [/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Answer: If you cut classes, no one calls your parents.[/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Question: Why does a retiree often say he doesn't miss work, but misses the people he used to work with? [/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Answer: He is too polite to tell the whole truth. [/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Question: What do you do all week?[/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Answer: Monday through Friday; Nothing [/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Saturday & Sunday I rest. [/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]Share this one with all the retirees that you know. [/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]I'm sure they can relate to some of them![/font]

AND, if you have not yet retired, look what you have to look forward to.

Happiness is a voyage, not a destination,

there is no better time to be happy than...NOW[/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]

[/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]

[/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]

[/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]

[/font]

[FONT='Times New Roman', serif]

[/font]

[Elaine May]

When I had managed to decipher what you had posted I found it very funny. I can't wait to join you in January!